I know we have been hearing about bullying a lot. I am always interested in hearing new and innovative ways to give our kids the skills they need to handle bullying and also to have the courage to be an “upstander” instead of a “bystander” and step in to help their peers who are being bullied.
I just found this article that I did not post in the Fall, after attending a YOUR TEEN program on Bullying.
The panel of experts talked about a whole slew of issues surrounding bullying. The most interesting part of the discussion (at least for me) was the part where they discussed what skills kids need to help victims of bullying. They contended that, kids do not know instinctively what to do in a bullying situation. They are placed in a touchy peer situation. They suggested telling our kids the following:
1. You can stop the situation by going over and telling the bully to leave the victim alone. If that is too much they can ask the victim to come play with them away from the bully.
If they don’t feel comfortable doing that, then:
2. After the bullying episode, they can ask the victim to come and play with them and be kind in that way.
3. Tell an adult. Many kids might feel uncomfortable doing this, if so they can do it privately, away from where kids are fighting.
4. Let them know that they can always come to you if they find that they are uncomfortable managing the situation themselves.
Bullying can be stopped in many ways. Teaching our kids to be “upstanders” is just one of them.