Guest Post By Harriet Cabelly
“We must remember that intelligence is not enough. Intelligence plus character – that is the goal of true education.” Martin Luther King Jr.
As we welcome in the new school year, let’s start thinking about our kid’s character traits. These are the foundational blocks of their humanity. That is what will carry them through their life-long journey.
Most of us our already monitoring our kid’s academic performance and achievement levels. But let’s not forget to be mindful of and hone in on their little personhoods – their ‘humankind’, their personal qualities.
Here are ten ways to get started:
1. Praise (specifically) traits such as thoughtfulness, helpfulness, kindness, sensitivity. “That was so thoughtful of you to call grandma to see how she’s feeling.”
2. Praise effort, not just outcome. Use labeling language such as, “You gave it your best; you really persevered.”
3. Model caring, sensitivity and service to the world around us. “What can we give to this homeless man.”
4. Show enthusiasm for their interests, however different they are from ours. They are not our clones and we want to encourage their own unique interests and abilities.
5. Encourage questioning, even without having exact answers. This keeps the mind open, curious and excited to all that’s in our world.
6. Allow for mistakes. It’s the fertile soil for growth and change. Accountability and amends spring forth out of mistakes.
7. Allow them to come up with possible solutions to difficult situations. They’re trying on different hats and we must treat them with respect.
8. Allow them to do for themselves what they can. There’s no better exclamation of pride, joy and feelings of competence than, “Look, I did it myself!”
9. Acknowledge their difficult feelings; don’t take them away. They need to know it’s O.K. to feel bad and they will come through it. Empathy and understanding shines through here.
10. Allow for a purple cow. There is artistic license with children’s imaginations at play. Let them dream. (Don’t worry, they will realize eventually that real cows aren’t purple)
Let’s grow emotionally healthy kids. Some will be high academic achievers and some won’t. But all can be successful and well-adjusted, taking pride in themselves and feeling good in their pursuits.
Do you want to learn more? Join us for Harriet’s LIVE tele-seminar:
October 22 9-10pm EST
Character Counts: Building Character Strengths In Our Children
Harriet is a social worker and life coach emphasizing living life to its fullest and creating a good life out of (or despite) adversity.
Learn more about Harriet at RebuildYourLifeCoach.com and read the latest from her blog. Harriet is also a parent coach and facilitates many parent workshops. She is passionate about empowering parents to be the best they can be. “We only get 18 years to ‘technically’ raise our kids. Let’s parent in the most conscious and reflective way possible.”